The Face of.....

            God has really been trying to teach me some pretty difficult lessons lately. At least the way He’s teaching me feels difficult, but as thick as my skull is I can understand why. I can be pretty stubborn at times. I’ve been waking up way too early these days, so I do a lot of thinking about what God is trying to teach me and I do a lot of praying. It is my deepest desire to be like Christ and to live a life that is both pleasing and honoring to Him. Many times I fall short of that, but thankfully He is very gracious.

            Am I as gracious to others as He is to me? I wish I could say yes, but not really. As usual, this reminds me of a story, and a recent lesson. I have this t-shirt that I got when I made a donation to the Arthritis Foundation. It says, “I am the face of arthritis.” I usually wear it around the house when I know I’m not going out. I’m not sure how I feel about it. I’m not sure how folks would react to me while wearing it. I just don’t wear it that often for some reason, but it makes me think.

            This past Sunday, I attended church without my husband. He was traveling and I was on my own. I’ve really felt out of touch at church lately, which is not usual for us, but with mom’s recent hospitalization and her now living with us, things are a bit different and we’ve had to pull back from serving in our favorite ministries for a time. We make it there when we can. I sort of felt lost without my husband there. I felt a little lonely, even in the midst of lots of people. I know it sounds silly, but it is very possible to feel lonely in a large crowd, at least for me anyway, and I would suspect for others as well. I quickly found a group of young folks to sit with and was greatly blessed by the service.

            At the end of the service, everyone was buzzing around doing their thing and busy greeting friends. I felt weird, even a bit out of place. I made my way out of the worship center and went to ask someone a question. I received what felt like a short, distracted answer and the two people I was talking immediately turned away and went back to chatting and visiting. I’m not going to lie, it hurt my feelings a bit. (I know, I’m so silly) Anyway, I stood there a moment and after realizing that they were not going to talk to me, I picked up my toys (my Bible, journal and purse) and went home. The house was quiet, so I took it to the Lord in prayer. (After a brief pity party) As always, I needed to stop pointing the finger at others and turn it back to myself. I feel pretty sure that these two ladies did not intentionally ignore me, or mean to hurt my feelings.

            I have done the same thing to people I am sure. You get busy at church, chasing kids, serving, talking to friends, rushing home to make lunch, socializing, etc. and you don’t even notice that someone is trying to get your attention. I would never intentionally do this, but I know I’ve done it. We all have. How does this relate to my t-shirt you ask? Well, we all have different faces don’t we? You know the ones. Plaster on a smile and tell folks you are fine. Well, I have discovered that there are many people who are hurting in lots of different ways. They may not be hurting physically like I do with my arthritis, they may be hurting in the hearts, or there may be hidden scars, but most of us have experienced some kind of pain…cancer scars, infertility, abuse, loneliness, rejection, an unfaithful spouse, hidden sin, shame, insecurity, and a host of other issues. Most people don’t realize that I struggle with a debilitating arthritis. Most of the time I try to mask it, but I truly am the face of arthritis. Most people don’t know that my dear friend suffered through breast cancer for more than a year because she stays strong, and keeps a really good attitude. She is the face of cancer. Most don’t know that my other friends deal with physical pain every day, or with deep emotional scars because if we don’t see it, we don’t really know it’s there, especially if we are not looking. They are the faces of pain and hurt.

            Here is the lesson for me from all of this. Am I really looking? Am I really listening? Do I really care? Am I really looking at these faces? At these hearts? Jesus did, and He does. During His short time walking this earth, He looked, He listened, He cared. He touched. He healed. He comforted. He laughed and cried with people. He took their hands and looked them right into the eyes. He stopped long enough to really see. He did not ignore them or get too busy to notice the lonely, the sick, the lost, the dying, the sad, the weary. He cared enough to really care. This is a BIG lesson for me. Whether I’m at home helping to care for my sweet momma, standing alone in church or surrounded by a bunch of my dearest friends, I need to be looking closely enough that I don’t miss someone who really needs a hug or a touch.

            I’ll give you a really good example. This week a dear friend of mine surprised us and stopped by for a visit. My mom was having a very hard day. She has been through so much and continues to fight hard to get better but she was struggling that day. She has lost a lot and is grieving over her loss. She came out of her room, swollen eyes from crying and immediately apologized to my friend for her tears. What happened next? My friend took her hands, hugged her so gently and listened. She let her cry on her shoulder. Then she looked her in the eyes and told her some very sweet and encouraging words. She acknowledged mom’s hurt and cared enough to encourage her in it. It was such a beautiful moment. I so appreciated her taking the time to love on mom. This friend is an inspiration to me. I love her dearly.

            This beautiful scene along with my t-shirt convicted my heart. Lately, I seem to get frustrated with folks more quickly than normal. I am tired (no excuse) and some days are hard, so my ugly side rears its head more often than I’d like to admit. I let little things annoy me. I get lonely. I miss serving at church. I feel like life is moving on without me. Sometimes I take it out on the ones I love most. Ugh! That’s not how I want to be at all! That silly t-shirt taught me a lesson, or at least God used it to teach me a lesson. The next time someone tries to talk to me or get my attention, whether at church or at home, I want to be like Jesus and take the time to really listen and love them well. I do not ever want to make someone feel rejected. The next time I see someone standing alone at church, I’m going to make sure I extend kindness to them and say hello and ask how they are doing…and really listen to their answer. Jesus touched more lives in three years on this earth than I’ll ever touch in a lifetime most likely. But, that does not mean I should stop trying.

            Instead of feeling sorry for myself the next time I feel ignored or rejected, I need to turn around and look for someone who needs a hug. Instead of withdrawing into that seemingly safe place of hermitville, I need to pick up the phone and call someone who has been missing at church lately, or send a note to a hurting friend. A hug or a note goes a really long way. Well, now that God has pointed out these things, I’d better get off of this computer and do something about it. I hope these simple words encourage you to do the same today. Make that call. Offer that hug. Send someone flowers (I just this moment got some flowers from my sweet husband, I love that man!) Look someone in the eyes and give them your full attention. I promise you, it’ll make their day, and yours. God bless and thanks for reading.